Well, Let's Talk About Sex

Yes, sex is indeed a topic of discussion. Don't worry, everyone is allowed to think and to think aloud (errr..am I quoting Jeff Ooi?). Please admit that not a single soul here has never discussed sex before. Or at least, arguing on the subject matter at least once in their lifetime. Many people approach sex in a disgusting manner. Albeit many would agree that sex is not exactly what is being depicted in the adult movies. Sex, in a simple word, is a lifestyle. It is a way of human being manifests his love. And of course, it must be contained.

Okay, let's talk about something relevant to us nowadays. I've heard many stories about sex. Particularly about pre-marital sex. I personally listen to a story of a guy who had sex with a tudung-clad lady. That is one of his stories. I'm sure there's a lot more to come. Another story of a girl slept with two different guys. To add more to the list, a lady personally told me of her story having sex with her boyfriend for more than once and that has been going on for quite sometimes. At the end of the day, I can only ask myself, am I the only one who is still virgin in KL?



My friend is in Kementerian Perdagangan Dalam Negeri & Hal Ehwal Pengguna claimed that his department is constantly raiding porn vcd stalls and they seized self-made VCD porn a lot. Particularly made by our Malay youth. I guess our Malay ladies are in demand for acting in adult vcd (should they make it into reality show here?). Maybe they can earn well above their means as compare to what their fellow friends who get money from PTPTN. Ah, I can't blame them after all. "Siapa bilang gadis Melayu tak menawan", right?

And now the Parliament is arguing on Sex Education. Really, do we need a sex education course in our academic syllabus? You've got to be honest with this. Aren't we supposed to learn about this since early age. Maybe for guys when they first get their wet dream and for ladies, when they first get their period.

Why people are getting so excited about sex? Why they want to venture into sex? For one thing I can tell you off the hook is that, sex is pleasure. Sex is good. Unless it is a forced sex like rape. Our young people are inquisitive in nature. They think casual sex is a trend nowadays. Frankly I don't think so.

For me, sex is pure. It has to stem from the feeling of responsibility plus a sense of love from two consenting adults. Okay, some may argue that people in love can be two consenting adults and practically okay to have sex. Nay, that's not exactly what I mean. I mean, for you to get into sex, it takes more than love. It takes responsibility (translates it into a marriage institution). Responsibility for the other person than yourself. That is love.



Studies in Malaysia shows that there are three main reasons why people divorce. These three popular reasons are money, sex and family affairs. Most couple do not discuss the issue of sex openly with their spouse, fearing that this will invoke the feeling of embarrasment for either party (could the pre-ejaculation be the real issue here?). Hell, why do we have to discuss this? Our parents never discuss this. And so did our grandparents. Well, I tell you what. We need to break this tradition. We've got to be transparent but tactful in discussing this issue. The family harmony is in stake.

People are doing casual sex in secret hideout think that this is thrilling. But I tell you what, it is more thrilling to know that the girl you bonk with do not get her period after few weeks having sex with you. Then you start to sweat alot!

The key point here is the openness to discuss this. I know it's a taboo to talk about sex. But for how long? Sometimes we just have to break the tradition. We don't talk sex for lust. We talk sex from the standpoint of academic. It has to start from home. We do not need the Parliament to decide the issue. We have to make sure that when it comes to certain age, boys and girls will have some restrictions. The mothers can tell stories to their young girls. The fathers can share some tips with their sons.

It has to start somewhere somehow. If you guys have any more good ideas, feel free to share. As I said, thinking is allowed here.

Last night I had a chat with Didie. Didie complained that some juniors think she is a snobbish and an awfully garang senior. She said, they just judge her through her physical look. Well, I don't agree with them at all. I know this lady since the first day she landed in the States. Erm, that didn't sound quite right. I know her since a few days before she left M'sia for Penn State. At that time her family was quite worried because she had dengue fever. And later, when she arrived, I still remember her sick face when she was stranded in Philadelphia International Airport.

So here I attached some photos of her while I was there.





I must say that she is among the most hearty juniors I have while I was in Penn State though. She and Mahirah baked brownies for my birthday. She came to me when she had problems with Awie (actually that's how they two got together..heheheh). That I can remember clearly. Some people say that our face look alike. Okay, I really doubt on that one though!




See, if you want to know people, you've got to go beyond taking a glance on them. Make friends with them. Ask them questions about themselves, about their families and about their friends. Who knows, you could be in the same crowd or in the same circle of friends. Besides, this world is too small for another fight. No?

I guess it is okay to say it here. I realize that my juniors in PSU are growing mature and becoming more sophisticated. However, through my eyes, I still view them as 19 year old juniors because that was when I first met them. During that time, they asked me a lot for direction and guides to adapt in college life. Of course, I felt more than welcome to be their guide, be their senior and most important of all, be their abang. I felt it was like a responsibility for me to care and to nurture them. Yup I know, not many of them got really close to me after they reach sophomore year but a few still maintain such relationship.



So my attitudes towards them are still maintained even up till today. I still want to know what's going on in their life. How's the life has been treating them in the States. Who is the new person in their life. How's the family in M'sia. We often share those things back in Penn State because it was such a small community back then.

That is why I keep communicating with them even until today. The memory spent together cannot be easily removed. Eventhough the time still continues and the age is still rising, for me, they are still 19 year old. And I like to keep it that way. :)

Last night I went through all my digital video files which I had kept since my college days. Well, there are few of them still left intact. One of them is the RA Formal Night Dinner. It was good to see all the familiar faces in that video. Not to mention, my date for that night is Shahida. She's real good at dancing. So I decided to re-edit and make the file smaller here so you guys can watch it. It's only 3 MB worth of file (after edited for web-streaming).



If you guys are lucky, you might catch me and Shahida danced in the video. That was the first time I danced in public, and hopefully would be the last one.

p/s: Oh, did I tell you guys that I went to jazz restaurant last week? Good singer, Noryn Aziz!

the strongest thing in the world often seems the weakest, for instance
gentleness is stronger than cruelty,
patience is stronger than impatience,
mercy is stronger than revenge,
love is stronger than hate

This is the saying on my 20" Apple Cinema Display in the so-called office. It will be my reminder and remedy for feeling miserable these few days.

I don't think I have enough sleep since last week. I constantly woke up in the middle of night around 3 to 4 am. Something is bothering my mind. I could only sleep after the subuh comes in, which made me wake up at right at 11.02 am. Yep, it does sound ridiculous but it does happen.

"Saat tak seorang pun yang faham perasaanmu, berlarilah kepada Nya"

So when my eyes opened during those times, I would reach for Along's TIME magazine, ASTRO magazine, my own paperwork and proposals, Along's National Geography magazine and the newspaper. My last resort - read the quran and perform solat.

Hmmm..Ramadhan is coming closer. Does forgiveness await me in this coming holy month?

Undelivered Message



Loved , and you'll be loved. Seek to understand, and you will be understood. Listen, and your voice will be heard.

I saw that on my sister's YM. I couldn't disagree more with her. Sometimes I do ponder how exactly can I deliver the message to the other soul that I truly care about her. The word care alone doesn't really convey the real message. To say the four-alphabet-word would be a retroactive act, at least for now.

But how to convey the message if the communication channel is closed. This is a real challenge. I am facing a solid wall in front of me.

So after the Isya'a prayer I had a monologue with my Creator. I'd ask, can I make a trade with You? A 'tawasul', if I may. Like in the story of three people behind the closed cave. What if You grant me one du'a with all the good deeds I did in the past? The deeds which I never ask for any return. The deeds which I did for the sake of helping others to improve themselves and get themselves out of scarcity.

And I left the praying mat with a full and clear conscience. My intention is pure and noble. I won't let anything, especially the trivial issues to bog me down and stop me from pursuing my intention. So, help me God.

Ideas Rendered and Ideas Tendered

I went to Universiti Malaya last night. The charity organization which I joined, MIND, had been invited to participate in one of the residential colleges' activities for disabled people. There were other few prominent people being invited as well. Most of them are disabled people. I must say that I've been amazed by some of the invited guest speakers. One of them is a practising lawyer. He was a legal counsel for Bursa Saham Kuala Lumpur for 15 years and now he establishes his own legal firm. What is more interesting about this person is that he is blind for all this while. Now he is developing his own career after leaving BSKL for good.

Very much interesting eh?

Yes, I'm always inspired when I see this kind of spirit. The spirit of independence. The spirit of enlightened. He sees lights when people around him see dark future for him. He reacts in kindness without being judgemental towards his audience. I can feel his warmth and his loving personality while I chatted with him. Yes, we must always look and find that goodness in people. Regardless whoever is he or she.

Unfortunately, I couldn't spend much time there because the clock was ticking to almost 12 o'clock midnight.

On the way home, my mind could'nt escape from keep thinking about the idea I threw to my ex-deputy principal back in school. Now he is the principal for Sek. Sains Alam Shah (I always abhor the idea of putting the word Sains in front of Alam Shah). I told him that I want to initiate a project. I need 10 students who are the lowest in their batch, either academically or socially. I said, I want to help these students. I do this out of my conscience and I don't ask anything for return. I want to carry out my social obligation solemnly. Previously, I tried once with Rumah Anak Yatim Tunku Budriah but there was too much of red tapes that I needed to go through. So i cancelled that plan. This time, I went straight to the source of power/influence.

"Berikan aku sepuluh belia, nescaya akan ku gegarkan dunia!" - President Soekarno of Republic Indonesia.

Yes, he said that during 'Konfrontasi Malaysia-Indonesia'. (I also recall the fact that he said,"Ganyang Malaysia!" during that trying time). That's the power of youth. It's a shame if we can't harness this power for our own advantage. For the betterment of our own society.

I believe in human potential. Anyone has potential to grow beyond than what he realizes for himself. For me, I believe in Adidas's slogan - Impossible is Nothing! I feel pity for those people who do not know how to break from his own box. I'm not saying that I'm the expert at that. I am still learning but I think, I may as well share with people of what I know about some techniques. I want to have win win situation. I don't want to see these young people get influenced into something bad. Perhaps, being 'rempit' once they graduate from high school. Or, screwing their own life by taking drugs or smoking.

Furthermore, I notice the culture of excellence is eroding very fast in my alma mater. In fact, it is eroding elsewhere to. I'm not talking about the academic excellence per se, but the excellence in achieving the maximum potential of a human.

Just imagine if these young students turn into idealists. They stand tall on their principle. Be firm on what they positively believe. They act positively upon their belief. Would't that something we want from the youth nowadays?

And I am here offering my service free of charge. No question ask.

Not much of Stories



I attended Copot's wedding last week. It's kinda weird to wish Congratulation to his father. "Ermmm, ini ayah Fauzi ya? Tahniah pakcik!". I've been calling him Copot or Fa'oz for the past 9 to 10 years and all of sudden, I muttered his real name reluctantly. First because I wasn't sure if that old man is his dad. Secondly, I wasn't quite sure how to pronounce his name correctly.

We had quite a number of boys turned up that day. For the first time in this year I met with SBY* (se-bai) and Tibao*. The rest is just the same faces whenever we have wedding among our friends.

Okay, enough of the wedding stories. Now, next thing.

Yesterday we had a friendly futsal match with SASsian class of 94. They were our seniors when we were Form 2. It was a good game. I think I was a pretty good at being a goalkeeper. There were few familiar faces among the seniors. One of them is Paipon.

I remember him as one obnoxious senior in 2B4. Yeah, we were physically small back then. And he was like a coconut tree height 'pailang'. But now, he's just slightly above average height for a standard Malaysian. Not that intimidating (especially when you have lived with 2 meter tall of people for 5 years).

A few of us played a bit rough that night. Ijane the senior got tackled a few times by different players of us. Hahahaha, can't imagine if we did that when we were in school. Surely we got 'rehabilitated' in the rehabilitation room of Dato' Onn house. Then, we're fucked!

Then, there was Bob the fat guy too. Yeah, he's fat. Real fat. The reason why I remember him is not because of his fatness. It's because of one incident in Zaaba House when we were Form 2. It didn't happen to me though. It happened to my friends in Zaaba.

Bob came back to the room, shouting and yelling to the juniors, asking them to gather in the room at 11.30 pm. That is when the light goes off. The moment they turned off the lights, this guy yelled again, "Haaa..apa lagi..cepat tonggeng! Tonggeng cepat!! Aku nak toron sorang-sorang!". Geezuzzz...everyone was scare shitless!!

Hahahahaa...I guess everyone cursedg him all night long!

Yep, almost all the good stories resurfaced again when we meet familiar faces. Stories which we probably won't remember until someone reminds us again. I'll never forget those seniors who beat me when I was in school. Same goes to seniors who showed me kindness and the meaning of patience like Abg Ungku, or Abg Husyairi and a few others. I don't mind to call them abang if I stumble with them in a street.

Anyway, I won't trade my experience in all boy's boarding school with anything else in this world.

Vocabulary
SBY = Saiful Bahri Yusof
Tibao = Shahriman
Pailang = Thug
Toron = sodomize

To dearest you, thank you for the gift. Truly appreciate it. And yes, I've bought the present for myself,"The Success Principles".

Wednesday is a Big Day

Well, well...now we have come to the most dreaded day, Wednesday Sept 7th. I mean, in the next few minutes lah. Tomorrow at 2.30 pm I will be doing a presentation in front of board of directors of KLIA Holdings. Hmmm...I hope not all of them would be there, especially Tan Sri. Or else I'll be cold as dead meat.

No, I'm not afraid of doing presentation. It's just that the last time I had this kinda presentation is when I was in my senior design course. In front of Prof. Nedwick, of course.

Anyway, whatever it is, after this presentation is done, I will make sure I buy a gift for myself. First because I haven't bought anything for my birthday. So I'm thinking, getting a book by John Canfield, The Success Principles, would cut it. I've been dreaming to have and to read this book since I first saw it a few months ago. This will do as my birthday present.



Secondly, I think this would be the first time for me to get a birthday present for myself. Never in my entire life to buy present for myself. I just thought, buying thing is just the same thing; you buy stuff for yourself. No big deal. Well, this is time to change that thought, eh?

Another Year Closer to Death

Yup, can't deny that fact, can I? Anyway, thank u for those who sms me on my birthday eve. It was very thoughtful of them to sms me. For those who don't sms me, shame on you!! Hahahaha...

Well, a very special thank you goes to my friend who called me a few minutes after 12 midnite. You put smile on my face for all night long. Not to mention, I received a cute hand-made birthday card from her as well.

Tomorrow I shall attend a program in Memorial Tunku Abdul Rahman. It's scheduled to start at 9 am and I tell you what, 9 am seems very intimidating for me! My day usually starts at 11 am.

The program in Memorial Tunku Abd Rahman is supposed for the children of August 31st. I'm one of them. I've been getting their invitation for the past 4 years including this one but my parents had to reject it due to my absence. I guess now I have to come since they persistently send the invitation card to me. I wonder what do I have to do for tomorrow.

To my dear friend, you know I would invite you to come along with me if you are here! That would mean a lot for me.

Anyway, what do I think about me getting closer to death? I think everyone should start appreciate everybody in his/her life. People say, we always take things for granted. Or, take people for granted. We know today our friends are being nice to us. Sometimes they go a little bit extra for us. It is time for us to do the same to them. I'd the same to them. I would go a mile extra to friends I really care. I don't feel ashamed to tell them that I care about them. Friends around us shape our mind, our actions and our personality. They are like mirrors to us. So, why don't we return the courtesy by doing the same things they would do to us.

Oh well, if they happy to do nothing for you, they are not your good friends. And if they ridicule your ambitious ideas, it means you better leave these losers and get into another crowd which share the same values like yours. Malaysia has 24 millions of people. Be wise, be smart!

In my conclusion, be nice to people around you. If he/she treats you like star, make sure you return the same courtesy to him/her. That will make you a very much better person. I would do exactly what I preach to people. I would treat people nicely (not that I don't treat people nicely now..it's just my affirmation for future).

Don't be nasty to people without any valid reason to do so. Not good....not good!