Selintas rasa di malam hari ini

Aku datang lagi menitip sejarah hidup.

Bukan untuk tatapan aku, tapi buat santapan minda bagi anak-anak aku bila aku sudah tiada lagi. Andai kata kalau aku tak ada lagi, biar tulisan aku ni jadi tanda kenangan bagi anak-anak aku mengenal ayahnya.

Apa-apa pun, malam ni bukan aku nak menulis tentang kisah suka atau duka. Cukup untuk ceritakan apa yang terbuku di hati.

Perjalanan hidup kita semua ni hebat. Jika tidak hebat, tuhan takkan jadikan kita semua. Cukup hebat jika kita tidak rencanakan dalam kitab hidup, ibarat kita mendustai keberuntungan yang tuhan kurniakan pada kita.

Aku bersyukur aku punya dua orang cahaya mata yang comel, penyejuk hati dan penghilang lara. Aku bersyukur punyai seorang teman hidup yang setia, yang berjiwa lemah lembut dengan segala kedegilan aku dan keegoaan aku.

Tekad aku untuk tahun 2023 ni, aku nak tuliskan journal hidupku secara aktif. Menghitungkan semula apa yang baik, apa yang aku mahu perbaiki, apa yang aku mahu kecapi dalam dunia ini pada tahun ini.

Aku rasa ini penting untuk jiwa aku rasa sempurna. Mahu jadi achiever. Mahu jadi orang yang mencapai sesuatu. Sungguhpun kalau aku lihat semula hidup ni, rasa macam jauh lagi mahu jadi manusia hebat. Tapikan, macam aku katakan tadi, kehebatan dan keberuntungan yang tuhan kurniakan pada kita ni adakala tersamar disebabkan tumpuan kita pada yang remeh temeh.

Jadi jurnal ini bagi memusatkan kembali apa yang aku boleh kawal dalam hidup aku. Segalanya boleh diuruskan jika aku kuatkan segala iltizam dalam jiwa untuk capai apa yang aku mahu. Tuhan sudah berjanji pada makhluk manusia, Dia takkan bantu kita mengubah apa yang kita mahukan, selagi kita sendiri tidak mahu berusaha mengubahnya.

Inviting a Partner

Seriously aku tak pernah nak ajak sapa-sapa jadi partner aku.

Bukan senang nak berpartner dengan aku, sebab aku ni gila kuasa. Aku value aku punya independence. Bila dah ada partner, we can't make the decision by ourselves. Always kena consult with the partner.

But anyway, even bila aku dah ajak jadi partner pun, aku kena draw the line. Aku still have veto. Aku still the decision maker.

Aku percaya untuk satu-satu venture tu berjaya, semua orang kena ada bidang kuasa dan ruang tanggungjawab masing-masing. Stick to it. At the end of the day, business ni kena tengok pada aliran revenue kita. Aliran cash yang bisnes ni ada. Sembang macam mana deras pun, tapi hasil tak masuk pun taraguna.

Betul tak?

So, aku bagi kawan aku masa seminggu untuk dia decide. Or else, aku move. No hard feeling. It's just business.

Cari Rejeki Mencoba Nasib di Bumi Keraton

 30 Nov 2022

Aku berada di bumi Jakarta. Kali ini perlu ada satu direction yang jelas bagi startup aku. Cari apa yang aku impikan.

Tapi apa yang aku impikan?

Apa yang telah aku lakarkan secara jelas; di ruang minda, di ceruk hati dan di kotak perasaan?

Hal ini yang perlu diperhalusi. Yang mesti dijelaskan sejelas yang mungkin.

Sungguh aku terasa sangat kecil bila aku travel bersama-sama orang-orang yang hebat dalam bisnes mereka. Ada yang bercerita tentang fund raising. Ada yang bercerita tentang penggajian mereka. Ada yang bercerita tentang strategi konkrit mereka masuk ke pasaran antarabangsa.

Tapi aku sedar, sewajibnya aku ambil kesempatan ini menyedut jiwa berani mereka, semangat adventurous mereka, yang mahu membesarkan bisnes hingga dapat menggajikan beratus-ratus orang dan menghasilkan berjuta-juta pendapatan bagi bisnes ini.

Detik Bersejarah Malaysia

 Hari ni hari bersejarah bagi Malaysia. Anwar Ibrahim akhirnya dilantik jadi PM Malaysia yang ke 10.

Lama aku menanti Sdr Anwar jadi PM sejak dari tahun 1998.

Sebak aku tengok event ni. Menitik air mata sebab lama menunggu detik bersejarah ni.

Hello blog, aku datang lagi untuk memori

Bulan September dan Oktober penuh dengan rasa ujian. Ujian kesihatan dan juga bakal ujian pendapatan. Apakah aku bersedia? Insya allah demi anak-anak dan keluarga, aku kena cekalkan hati.

Bulan September ini banyak buat aku sekeluarga tak sihat. Sakit. Demam. Paling yang buat aku rasa emosi sangat bila anak lelaki aku, Ahmad Husyairi, dimasukkan ke Emergency. Doktor cakap anak aku dalam keadaan tenat. Virus infection in his lungs. Aku hampir terkedu. Pecah empangan air mata aku lepas bercakap dengan doktor di Emergency. Aku cakap, "Doc buat apa saja janji anak saya sihat".

Itulah ujian terbesar bagi aku. Anak-anak aku ada segala-galanya. Inilah rasanya menjadi seorang ayah. Ketua keluarga. Mahu atau tak, itulah beban yang diletakkan di bahu aku tatkala aku berakad nikah dengan isteri aku. Janji aku, anak-anak dan isteri akan aku jaga sebaik mungkin. Biarlah aku susah, janji anak-anak aku dan bini aku dapat makan.

Oktober ini dikejutkan dengan berita projek aku akan kena tutup. Atau pun dipindahkan. Aku yakin aku boleh survive dengan produk yang aku bangunkan dengan penuh kasih sayang. Insya Allah aku bangkit. Ini peluang untuk aku buktikan yang aku boleh maju ke depan. Aku buktikan produk aku boleh meraih jualan RM50,000 sebulan.

Memang agak mengejutkan. Tapi sebenarnya sudah dapat diagak dan dibaca. Tak ada masalah. Kena fokus dan kena tanamkan rasa positif dengan masa depan. Demi keluarga. Demi memenuhi impian aku. Kita boleh berjaya. Kita mesti berjaya.

Post 911: Muslims and America

Since the tragedy of September 11, the majority of the people in this country are pumped with an enormous degree of patriotism. The event, which cost so many of innocent lives, triggers the silent stereotypes to resurface against the minority, especially the Muslims, to a higher level than before. Within a few hours after the tragedy occurred, the media reported that Muslim people received verbal harassment as well as physical harassment from the local community. Even though the President of the United States, Mr. George Bush denounced the act of discrimination towards the Muslims in his speech dated back on September 17, 2001, the racism, the prejudice and the stereotypes against the Muslim community still continue today.

Racial profiling, discrimination by the government agencies and racist remarks from the local community are resulted from 9/11 tragedy and they are becoming more and more noticeable. Many of us do not realize it that people actually do these actions using the patriotism to justify their actions. These people are hiding behind the curtain of patriotism to deliver their incredulous agenda. Perhaps the advice from the Attorney General, John Ashcroft, in CNN on September 17, 2001, saying that the vigilante action upon the Muslims community will not be tolerated and the government will take action upon whoever causes the social disturbance, was only to provide a lip service to the Muslims society.

According to Counsel on American Islamic Relation (CAIR), there are numerous reports from late 2001 until now about the alarming level of discriminations. These reports reflect the negative impression held by certain sectors either in the government or the private corporations towards the Muslims.

For example, on February 3rd 2003, the FBI Director Robert Mueller as reported by MSNBC News has launched a controversial operation to count the mosques nationwide. The excuse provided by the FBI Director was that the mosques might be used as the venue to plan a terrorist attack on America soil. Again, this action obviously invited many disturbing thoughts about how the racism infiltrates the government agency which is supposed to uphold the justice for all.

In addition to that, in Philadelphia, a Muslim school guard felt that his employer was violating his civil right because he wasn't allowed to perform a Friday prayer in the mosque. This was reported in the Philadelphia Inquirer dated on Tuesday, June 18th 2002. According to Bernie Mattox, the new principal in that school, Edward Monastra, did not allow him to attend the Friday prayer although the previous principal did give Mattox a permission to do so. He then filed a report to CAIR. Bernie Mattox claimed the he gave up 4 days of lunch hours just to cover for 2 hours he lost due to his Friday prayer. However when the permission for him to perform the Friday prayer at the mosque was revoked, he had to use sick times to leave each Friday afternoon. When the school district administration was asked how to deal with this matter, they only offered three possibilities: let the Muslim students and staff to form a congregation for prayers on school property, let Mattox find a nearer mosque to the school, or transfer Mattox to a school nearer to the mosque of his choice. The CAIR considered this offer as an insult to Muslims.

Perhaps people do not realize how much the Muslims are affected by 9/11 tragedy. It was indeed a tormenting moment for all of us, regardless your skin color, religions and ethnicity. We all shared the same sorrow when the plane hijacked by the terrorists hit the landmark of this country. However the blame for the tragedy should not be directed to the Muslims just because of a few extremists in Muslim community. I still could recall the article I read in newspaper about Muslim-owned restaurants in New York City had to be closed due to the harassment they received from the local community. Another example is in Dallas, Texas when the jury found Mark Stroman guilty as charged when he murdered Vasudev Patel in last October. Stroman thought that this poor Hindu man is Muslim because he looked like a Middle Eastern and then Stroman killed him to avenge the attacks on New York and Washington. This vigilante action taken by him would not bring justice at all to everyone, not even to the victims of 9/11. Believe it or not, any action roots from the hatred and anger will not bring good result at all.

There are many instruments used to attack the Muslims either directly or indirectly. The media, especially the news often attacks the Muslim community as harboring the terrorist or they themselves could potentially be terrorists trying to attack the United States. In Hollywood, where the heart of film industry flourishes, the filmmakers themselves have become perpetrator of Islamiphobia when they are more often than not to potraying Muslims as agents of terrorism. The combination of the news and the movies industry slowly mould the image of Muslims as being violent and full of vices and let the Americans swallow these stereotypes quietly.

The Muslims believe in peace as a way to resolve the conflicts. Islam, the religion of the Muslims, derives from the Arabic word Assalam which means peace and harmony. The Muslims do not believe in aggression. The Muslims also do not believe in intimidation. However, the Muslims do believe in defending their country, their faith and their lifestyles. It is very easy to identify the Muslims especially the Muslims women because of them are wearing hijaab. Hijaab is a kind of clothes that cover the whole body of a female and this is a standard dress code for Muslims women. But soon after the September 11 event many of Muslims women have to abandon the hijaab due to fear from harassment. Thus it clearly shows the Muslims are denied the right to practice their religion and obviously this action violates the United States Constitution.

Incident after incident reported every day about the discrimination towards the Muslims seem not to be taken seriously. The government seems to do little to help the Muslims to achieve the same status as other people. In fact, the government itself imposes some of the most severe regulations upon the Muslims which they intrude some of the civil rights of Muslims. The Muslims in this nation feel their own government on their own land betrays them. How can the Muslims escape from the feeling of being dissatisfied, discomforted and disturbed when their rights are being trampled in front of them.

The Muslim's struggle needs recognition from every American citizen. As much as the blacks have suffered from their past history, as much as the gay community receives threat upons their lifestyles, and as much as the women community received unfair treatment in daily life, we the Muslims also face the same threats and the same challenges every day. The question now, what we should do about this? How we should act upon this? And when should we start to take the action?

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I wrote this for my AAA 497F course.

Debar Menanti Hari Kelahiran Hero Malaya

Tak lama lagi aku bakal menimang cahaya mata yang kedua. Kandungan bini aku semakin sarat, jelas kelihatan dia sering kepenatan. Aku cuba sebaik mungkin untuk bantu dia buat kerja rumah. Tapi aku respect bini aku sebab dia gigih siapkan segala kerja rumahnya.

Aku dah bersedia kemungkinan untuk baby ke dua ni mungkin kami akan menyambut kelahirannya lebih awal dari apa yang dijangka oleh doktor. Aku redha saja. Ada kemungkinan baby kami ni akan sama tarikh lahirnya dengan Aisya. Tapi ada kemungkinan juga dia lahir pada awal tahun baru.

Doakan saja kami baik-baik saja menghadapi detik-detik kelahiran bayi ini. Kami sudah sediakan nama untuk dia. Ahmad Husyairi. Kakaknya nama diberi Aisya Humaira. Nak ada signature AH bagi nama anak-anak aku.