Don't really know where to start writing. Too much thoughts stuffed in this heavy head. It's 3.28 am and I'm still awake, listening to the Beatles' songs. Cranking my head of what to write in my own blog.

This week is a double whammy of bad news in my family. First, I got phone call from my high school buddy, who is a doctor in Hospital Kuala Krai, saying that my grandpa is zeroing to his death based on medical observation and evaluation. He explained to me carefully on what was the attending doctor reviewed about my grandpa. He also recommended me to come home to Kelantan, maybe to see my grandparent for the last time while he is still alive.

Then, my mom was admitted to emergency ward in HUKM on last Monday at the very early hour. My brother called me up at 4 am when I was upstairs - fixing figures and figuring out my plan for my agriculture project. He said that we needed to bring the mother to a clinic. I ran down to downstairs and I saw my mom was semi conscious. I could see her eyes opened and she tried to mutter something, but somehow I couldn't identify what she was trying to say. While holding my mom's hand, I asked her a few questions and looked for recognizable response. I didn't get the respond I was looking for.

The brother and my dad were still arguing whether to bring the mother to a clinic or to a hospital. I thought - this argument is a waste. They wanted to ask for my mother's opinion. It was so obvious that my mother could not communicate at that time. Even if she did, we all could not understand a word what she said. So I thought, let's do something for the best interest of her.

Really I didn't actually know what to do. All I know was inspired from the ER tv series. I knew at that time my mom wasn't fully conscious and I tried to check her pulse. It sounded very quick. So I didn't fathom what was going on. Semi conscious but heart beat ran fast. So yes, we collectively agreed we needed to bring her to the hospital. Then a question came hard upon us. How were we going to move her to the hospital? Mother is overweight and three of us could not even lift her without probably injured her.

I said, "That's why the hospital has ambulance!".

But brother was a bit hesitate to call. He wasn't sure of what to say and how to give instruction. I was half shouted, 'Use your common sense!". I still held my mother's hand gently. Mother seemed to have difficulty to breathe and she looked as if she were in excruciating pain. Finally the brother called up and we asked for ambulance to be despatched to our house.

It took almost 40 minutes for the ambulance to reach our house. Surprisingly, no medical officer was available on that ambulance. I was totally flabbergasted! How on earth can an ambulance move around without qualified doctor on board? Two personnel quickly came into the house and started to arrange their stretcher for the mother to be carried out safely out from the house.

My dad joined the mother in the ambulance. I decided to let my mother to be carried to HUKM since my mom has always gone there for her scheduled medical check ups. I followed the ambulance to the hospital by driving my car.

Doctor and her medical staffs quickly ran checks on my mother once she reached the emergency ward. The doctor confirmed with me that my mom was low on sugar in her blood which was dangerous for her. My mother is a diabetic patient and being in hypoglycemic situation is a huge sin for her. So she was given sugar drip. I saw wires here and there attached to my mother's body. I didn't feel anything except that I was still furious at how one medical staff forcefully pushed the sugar tubes to go down into my mother's vein through the catheter stucked at her hand.

Mother regained her consciousness and began to ask me few questions like, how did she get to the hospital or who brought her to the hospital etc. So those questions confirm my assumption that mother was semi conscious. She even didn't feel the pain when a medical assistant pricked her skin and inserted a catheter into her vein.

I didn't want to write the rest of the event. Enough I'd say, our emergency response 'plan' worked out very well and I took the lead. My mother is now in HUKM for further examination and warded in nefralogy ward. She's scheduled for hemodialysis. I know this process will be painful for her and would cause uneasiness to her body. But that is the price to pay when she didn't want to take care of her health especially her diet with sugary meals and drinks. I decided to take off from work and visited her at the ward as often as I could. I massaged her as much as I could so that I could ease her muscle cramps due to sitting for too long in the bed. Bought her newspapers for her to read. Along came all the way from Rawang to visit her too. He even discussed with the specialist on what to do next. I let him to decide because practically, he's the eldest and he should take lead on this matter. My father just let his children do what we suppose to do in this kind of event.

I am just praying that my mom can come out from the ward as soon as possible so that she can meet her father before he closed his eyes for one last time.